Pain and Fear, Hurt and Loss
by TheFirstElf
Summary: When Raven loses control of her Rage, a Titan gets hurt. Will he forgive her? A BBRae Oneshot. Rated T for a reason.


Today Titan Tower was particularly noisy, and Raven hated it. It was raining outside, and her room was being renovated. This just left the common room.

Beast Boy and Cyborg were arguing again over videogames, and Starfire had somehow coerced Robin into learning traditional Tamaranian cooking.

"Duuude! I totally won that one! Fair and square!"

"Now Robin, to begin making Lilisthan Pudding, we must first mix mustard, tomatoes and Jelly of Orange in a bowl."

"BB, you know turning into an octupus is against the rules! 8 arms against 2 isn't cool, man."

"Ehm.. Star, are you sure you know what you're doing? That's not a winning combination..."

"Do not worry Boyfriend Robin, we are using the correct mix. Now help me stir this."

"I'd rather be an animal then eat one Cy!"

_Azarath Metrion Zinthos... shut out the noise... shut out the idiots..._

"Oh, it's on now Beast Boy! My Ninja Monkey's gonna beat you so bad, the only animal you're going to be turning into is gonna be bacteria!"

"Faster, Boyfriend Robin. The Pudding must be airborne before I apply my starpowers to it."

"Oh yeah? I'd like to see you try iron butt!"

_Azarath Metrion Zinthos..._

"Now friend Robin! Observe as it all fuses into a single pudding!"

Instead of becoming pudding, however, a giant blob of Mustard, Orange Jelly and Tomato pieces flew accross the room, until falling on...

Raven

And the whole room fell down laughing.

"Duuuude!" said Beast Boy, "I need to get a camera!"

Raven stood perfectly still, however one her emotions was fighting to get out.

"Let me out! You know you want to!" screamed Rage

"No. Not again. You're staying inside." she thought back

"The time when you had a choice is long gone Raven. Now, it's my turn to play!" cackled Rage

Raven felt herself being swallowed up in a vortex of pure anger, which was vented on the closest person to her: A small green man taking snapshots.

Beast Boy felt himself being hoisted up by an invisible force, his feet kicking the air. His eyes falling on four bright red eyes on his friend's face.

"Now who's laughing, funny man?" Rage-Raven shouted as she gathered more and more power into a black vortex surrounding the two.

BB felt something pulling his legs and his arms in opposite directions, stretching him.

"Raven! Stop this, I'm sorry!" he shouted.

She never answered, rather the stretching became stronger, and Beast Boy felt his arms and legs about to break. He began to shout in pain.

"Rae! You're hurting me! Please stop!" he yelled, "You don't have to do this!"

The stretching stopped momentarily, as Raven's face turned to normal

"You're right. I don't..." she whispered, but suddenly Rage was back.

"But I sure want to! AND MY NAME ISN'T RAE YOU STUPID BOY! I HATE YOU!" She laughed, summoning a number of kitchen knives and levitating them edge first in front of the helpless teenager.

"Let's do this, slowly, ok little man?" She cackled maniacally, as she began to push the points of the knives against Beast Boy, drawing blood.

Suddenly, an electric charge entered the vortex, stunning Raven and making Beast Boy drop to the ground.

Raven silently picked herself up, her emotions bottled up again. However, once she looked at BB, remorse kicked in, and she fled with tears streaming from her eyes.

_LATER IN THE HOSPITAL WING_

A cloaked figure stood beside a sleeping figure in a bed. Rachel Roth was trying to think of what to say, of how to apologize. Her emotions swirling in a whirlpool of questions and opinions.

"He'll never forget this Raven, nor will he forgive." whispered Timid,

"Why did you say you hated him?" asked Affection, "You know you don't..."

"Beast Boy knows what happened. He's not as idiotic as you think" said Knowledge, looking up from her book.

Happy didn't speak. It didn't seem right to her.

Meanwhile, the green Titan opened his eyes, and saw the cloaked figure. His eyes widened with fear and he screamed.

"Please don't hurt me..." he whispered, crying silently.

"I'm not going to..." she started, reaching out to hold his hand,

"AAAH! Leave me alone!" he yelled, backing away from Raven and falling off the hospital bed, before turning into a fly and flying away...

That look of pure fear in his eyes... hurt. A lot. Raven couldn't remember feeling so bad about herself, even during Trigon's return. Beast Boy had always been so cheerful, even when it wasn't the time, but now...

Raven sighed and teleported to the roof.

_LATER THAT NIGHT_

"Beast Boy can't sleep." Raven thought to herself as she lay on her own bed. "I can feel his emotions from here..."

Silently she got up and crossed the hall and stepped into Beast Boy's room. The bed was empty and Beast Boy was huddled in a corner, hugging his knees and rocking back and forth.

"He must have been more frightened then I thought..." Raven realized...

"Beast Boy... please get up..." she pleaded. No one, much less Beast Boy, had been afraid of her since her childhood on Azerath.

Beast Boy didn't answer, his eyes were completely blank, staring off into the darkness, reliving every single moment of that afternoon.

"That's it." Raven calmly stated, looking straight at the Titan, who never once met her eyes for fear of what he might see, "Beast Boy, I'm not leaving this room until you listen to me and talk to me. I can stand here all night."

Beast Boy looked up, as if he had just seen her, and whimpered quietly, curling up into a ball and shaking. His eyes, however, observed her movements, afraid of more pain.

"Beast Boy: What happened today will not happen again. I lost control of Rage, and, as much as I was provoked, my reaction was unacceptable. If we cannot get over this, I will tell Robin I'm leaving the Titans."

"Sorry..." BB whispered.

"Excuse me?"

"You haven't apologized. Not once. All day. You're not feeling sorry at all. Come on, confess, you enjoyed it." he whispered, finally looking at her in the eye, showing all of the pain, the hurt and the fear.

Raven blanched. He was absolutely right. She hadn't apologized yet. Moving closer, she ignored his cringes and hugged him fiercely.

"Beast Boy. I am so sorry. Please forgive me?"

"You said you hated me? Why would you say that? Is it true?"

"I don't hate you..."

"Yes you do. You shout at me all the time, even when I just want you to smile. You hate me. I get it, I just never thought you would say it..." he croaked, tears streaming down his face.

"Fine. If you think that, then I suppose I should just leave."

"Please..." Beast Boy whispered, misinterpreting what she meant, thinking she was going to leave his room.

Raven's head spun in shock. Turning around, she returned to her room and began to pack her things. Tomorrow morning she would leave the Titans. Permanently.

_MORNING_

"You're going? Where?" asked Cyborg.

"Somewhere where I won't hurt or scare anyone again." she answered, looking at the rest of the team minus Beast Boy.

"But why friend Raven? Beast Boy surely knows you didn't mean to cause him harm." cried Starfire

"He doesn't even want to talk to me. He's convinced that I hate him and asked me to leave, so I'm leaving. He's absolutely right."

Robin didn't speak at first, rather he put his hand on her shoulder, reassuring her.

"Our door is always open. Whenever you want to come back, you know you can." he said.

Raven silently turned around and opened the main door, only to find a pair of green eyes in front of her.

Beast Boy gulped and tried to mumble something.

"I'm leaving Beast Boy. I hope you'll be ok..." She said, patting his shoulder, but Beast Boy stepped back, however, seeing the hurt in her eyes, he stepped forward again and hugged his friend.

"Please don't leave..." he said, "Please... just... stay. I know you don't hate me."

"I can't stay BB. I won't risk hurting you again."

"Come on Rae. We need you..." he said, "I need you..." he whispered...

"Beast Boy..."

"Don't you get it! The reason why I got so upset is because I love you! And you said you hated me and you tried to kill me. I love you Rae, and if you leave I'll follow, even if I'm still scared."

"I..."

She never got a chance to finish because she was too busy kissing the green titan in front of her.


End file.
